Sometimes Yoga Fucks with You

When I was in college, before I ever started doing yoga, I had an English professor, Dr. Rich, who had to be in his late 60's, early 70's, and did yoga. I remember this because one class he came in and was talking about how he was in a twist the night before and started crying out of nowhere. I thought the whole thing was a little weird. 

After practicing yoga regularly for a few years now, I know that this sort of thing happens. Everything is stored in your body—anxiety, anger, sadness, happiness—all of it. Sometimes you can get yourself into a pose in which, out of nowhere, you're feeling things that don't rationally make sense to you. But if you go with it, it can be a good release. 

The other thing I've found is that in savasana strange things happen. And when they do, they generally freak me out. I tend to fall asleep in this pose. But sometimes I have the most vivid dreams. If they're even dreams. (Don't you need to be asleep for a while before you dream?) One time, I was walking down the street and my grandfather was on the other side, healthy and happy as could be. It was crystal clear. I called out to him and then I was jerked awake by the teacher bringing us out of the pose. It was pretty awesome seeing grandpa, but it was eerie how real it seemed. 

Tonight the vision was less peaceful. For whatever reason, I was sucked back into the moment I realized my grandmother was dying. And, not in the general sense of "she's been sick for quite some time now, so we won't have her much longer," but the "oh my god, what's that sound...dear god this is it" sense. That one moment when it sounded like she was choking and I jumped up to help only to realize there was nothing in the world I could do for her. That moment when my heart was ripped out of my chest. And it felt as real as when it happened. 

I don't have some great summation here or some lessen learned tonight. Just that sometimes, despite how awesome I feel after getting into flying crow or forearm stand, yoga has a way of just absolutely fucking with you. And I miss my grandma. 

Things My Grandma Said

The vernacular changes from decade to decade and from generation to generation. My grandmother's life spanned more than nine decades and several generations. One of our favorite ways in which this showed itself was in her colorful expressions. We got so used to hearing them over the years that I don't think any of us really gave them a whole lot of thought, they just always made us smile. 

My father recently spent some time looking up what some of them mean:

Thank you kindly. This one is pretty straightforward. In other words, thank you very much. The great thing about this one is that I've heard it said with complete sincerity and utter sarcasm. But, for the most part, this illustrates Grams soft nature and kind heart. People remember her for saying, "Thank you kindly," instead of "Thank you."

Oh my stars and garters. This, according to the interwebs, is a playful expression of astonishment. 

Gott im Himmel. This German gem means "Oh my god." Pronounced (by Grams anyways) as Goot in himmel.

The first two Grandma-isms have English roots, and this last one one is German, as noted. Grams was born in 1916 and some of these sayings could have been from her time, but also her parents, who were potentially born sometime in the mid to late 1800's. 

According to Wikipedia, between 1831 and 1840 a total of 599,000 people immigrated to the United States. This included about 207,000 Irish, about 152,000 Germans, 76,000 British, and 46,000 French. Between 1841 and 1850, immigration nearly tripled, totaling 1,713,000 immigrants, including at least 781,000 Irish, 435,000 Germans, 267,000 British and 77,000 French immigrants. Between 1850 and 1930, about 5 million Germans immigrated to the United States with a peak in the years between 1881 and 1885.

We know from diaries Grandma had of her family members, that our direct relatives came over from Ireland. So, it would seem along they way they made friends with the large numbers of English and German immigrants, and their expressions were carried down by Grams. And they continue...

Egads I tell ya. This soft expression of frustration seems to come from a shortening of "Ye gods." A sort of holy cow or oh my god or even heavens to Betsy. Which brings me to... 

Heavens to Betsy.  This mild expression of surprise seems to be somewhat untraceable in origin. The etymologist Charles Earle Funk published Heavens to Betsy! and other curious sayings in 1955, in which he posed that the origins of "Heavens to Betsy" were "completely unsolvable." Regardless, this American phrase was popular in the second half of the 19th century, all but disappearing in the 20th. Except for Grams.  

The whole kit and caboodle. A collection of things; everything available. Kind of like "everything but the kitchen sink" but including the kitchen sink.

And then there's one that Google has come up with no explanation for:

Up in Heaven sucking on oranges. This was frequently used when Grams was telling stories of the past that were before someone's time. For instance, if my Grandmother was telling a story about my Dad as a kid, as an aside she'd say, "But you were still up in Heaven sucking on oranges."

So now it's up to us to keep these sweetly unique sayings going. Miss you Grams.